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On the back of seven straight victories, the Geese travelled to Enfield Playing Fields once again, to take on second from bottom F.C. Vasco. The playability of the pitch was thought to be in jeopardy after a rainy couple of days. This signalled the start of a new wintry atmosphere that always effects this part of the season. However the decision lay with the referee. In an attempt to sway the referee’s decision, manager Paul Cully got physical with the pitch, scooping the surface water from the puddles with his battleship mitts working like hungry hippos. Dave ‘spout’ Enefer deemed this to be inefficient, so he dismantled Rory and his shell-like body was used to clear the puddles in record speed. The game was on.
The Geese were without Craig ‘six-hour tower’ Norris and Richard ‘chicken and hens’ Bates who played in the previous win over Rose & Crown and were still without Chris Cedrone due to his ankle injury. In spite of this the Geese welcomed back Chris Wicks after his weekend with Jordana at Reading ghost castle and Rob Cully after his ludo groin mischief. The claret and amber Geese were forced to use the dreaded away kit due to F.C Vasco playing in Orange. The blue second hand kit was sitting in Vullo’s boot waiting for its opportunity to spread mixed odours and unluckiness to its beholders. The Geese fans were in their numbers today, one reportedly travelling all the way from Leicester.
With F.C Vasco turning up literally 5 minutes before kick off, the Geese expected their unprepared opponents to be sluggish in the opening period, but it was the complete opposite. The Geese found it difficult to jenga possession, failing to connect four passes together. The game became a schoolboy run-around, slide into assembly on your knees affair.
Despite a lack of quality the Geese opened the scoring. A forward move was chess-ted down by Dan Jordan who crossed the ball for Paul Nodd to dod in with his cranium, a nice move that deserved a goal, uno-zero. The Geese faithful probably thought that after striking first the team would go on and get a grip of the game, today was not to be one of those days. A mix up at the backgammon allowed Vasco back into the match when Rob Cully let the ball out the mouse trap allowing tiddlywink Freddy Adu to equalise wearing his checkers gloves. Things got worse when the Vasco left back went on a mazy run and hit a 30 yard screwball scramble. The ball must have made friends with the wind in the air as it spun into the top-right hand corner.
The Geese were not playing at their best and looking like they had done too many conga rotations around the Norris’s Porch at Craig Norris’s birthday party the night before.
So at half time the Geese were 2-1 down. In football it does happen, no team has the monopoly to win every week – where’s the fun in that? So regardless of a few negative mump-head comments on the sideline, the players knew that things had to change in the second half, maybe the most important factor being the strong wind, blowing players over like dominoes. Senior Cully waved his wand in an attempt to provide a little Clapton chord-power for the second half, calling for Tony Cedrone to draft operation busy busy bumble bees into action attraction.
Changes were made, Hully Eigerolled Vullo and Brett replaced Buckaroo Belsey, Sidog tucked in at left back. The Geese were fired up at the re-start; a cross from the right saw Matt Hullis nearly bobsleigh one in at the back post with his first touch.
Passing became cleaner, and when a switch of play ker-plunked to the right-wing, Brett Norris went on a thunderous run cutting in at the by-line and whack-attacked the ball in off the bar. In quick succession Paul Dodd came close when his shot hit the bar. He was rewarded for his work-rate soon after when a neat through ball from Dan Jordan boggled the defence and dingbat Dodd was there to convert his second.
At 3-2 the Geese had the upper hand and looked to go on and add to the scoreline. Everyone must have thought this until a non threatening throw from the left wing was un-dealt with and the cross was headed in like a pop up pirate at the back post. The Geese switched off, left the gas on, and fell asleep in the armchair.
3-3 – game on. The score line was as uncertain as snakes and ladders, or even a game of fish power.
Pressure mounted on Vasco and the game looked to be in favour of the Geese again when Paul Dodd bore down on goal and crossed to Dan Jordan. Unfortunately his tap in was ruled to be offside by the square linesman who couldn’t of scene it. Tony Cedrone and Tony Vullo were in vicinity of the linesman and made full use of all their Italian hand gestures implying he didn’t have a Cluedo. Was the away kit going to be unlucky for geese yet again?
Paul Cully’s next trick was to risk pushing Neal Dodd into a five-man midfield, two minutes later guess who scored? In true rabbit pulling fashion, Neal scored another to increase his tally, delighting the tiger tank(s) Geese fans.
Looking for a two-goal cushion Matt Cully passed to Brett out on the right, who proceeded down the line and beat the left-back like a rounder-grounder with ease. The “Doug” look-alike knowing he was beaten and never going to get the ball outrageously turned his attention to Brett and tried to chop him down in frustration, but failed. This vile act, which was committed in front of the Geese support, is something no-one wants to see in football.
With minutes remaining the Geese earned a corner, however the ball was bush-bound. At this stage Director of Football Tony Perry retrieved the ball by diving in the prickly shrubs earning a face scar for his troubles. His ‘hands on’ approach was rumoured to have been a publicity stunt attempting to prove to the critics he is worth his six-figure salary. The resulting corner was picked up and struck by Paul ‘devil mouse’ Dodd, it somehow scrabbled through the crowded box and provided the third amigo for his hat-trick. Tony Perry claimed the assist; it must have been pay day.
The Geese took maximum points from today’s game; the final score ended 5-3. A poor first half performance was redeemed by an improved second. The fans went home happy, Pino Packer was on a hero quest and found mastermind Neal Dodd pitch side for an interview.
“Ello maaaate, yeeesss, c’mon three points, I’m ‘over the moon’. Hey we took a lot of stick today, some of it unnecessary as we knew we had to go for broke. If we are not playing well we know about it, so we don’t need criticism from the sideline in our game of life, we take our instructions from Paul Cully and after that, all we want is encouragement. I scored the winner, the top looked bigger on the hanger, Rob Dodd swings like Bernard Langer.
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